


Drink up, drink up, i’m so fucked up, all i want is you

by Ttvwd



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: Angst, Bad Parenting, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Harry's Perspective, Pining, Pre-Canon, Rivals to Lovers, Substance Abuse, What-If, student body president
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:40:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28756017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ttvwd/pseuds/Ttvwd
Summary: After Harry had laid in his bed for around 3 hours, snoozing off whenever and waking up abruptly about five minutes after, he had the perfect idea.He needed to find some sort of dirt on Cassandra. Not that it was going to be easy, the girl was fucking perfect right down to the bone. But come on, everyone must have at least one skeleton in their closet.___Pre-canon oneshot about what went down when both Harry and Cassandra were running for student body president.
Relationships: Harry Bingham/Cassandra Pressman
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18





	Drink up, drink up, i’m so fucked up, all i want is you

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, so I've been working on this for a couple of weeks now and I finally wanted to publish it! The story is written from Harry's perspective, and is about Harry and Cassandra running for student body president. 
> 
> The title is from the song 'sex money feelings die' by Lykke Li, and I thought it fit pretty well with the story. 
> 
> Please also note that I'm not american and therefore some things might not be completely correct about the whole student body election thing - but I've just taken some liberties and ran with it. 
> 
> Anyway I really hope u enjoy<3

Fucking Cassandra Pressman and her dumb need to be perfect.

When Harry had first put his name on the ballet, he thought it would be an easy win, but now? Not so much.

It wasn’t like Cassandra needed the title of student body president on her Yale application, she was already a part of everything the school could possibly offer. Him on the other hand, he needed this more than anything right about now.

Not only was Kelly being weird and dismissive, but his mother was up his ass, his father had just died, Campell was charging him way too much and Cassandra suddenly decided she wanted to make his life even worse.

His posters had already been hung up all around the school before Cassandra even announced she was running, which is just bizarre considering she’s the type of person who always signs up for whatever school activity; first.

In fact, everything about Cassandra had been a little unusual throughout the start of senior year. First off, Harry had noticed her skipping quite a bunch of classes, which pissed him off, especially because it seemed the teachers had no problem with it.

Of course, if Harry skipped a few classes the teachers would be mild about it too, but he actually had pretty legitimate reasons for skipping, besides his mom is the principal. Although that kind of made everything worse, because she would just be pissed that he skipped school, even though he is way too emotionally drained to attend some days (and she should know that). But Cassandra didn’t deserve to just skip classes and then come back to school acting as if everything is normal.

He wasn’t actually threatened by her running for presidency, he was just pissed that she felt so special that she waited weeks before putting her own name on the ballet. Couldn’t she at least have given him a heads up?

It had been a normal Thursday when he saw the poster in the hallway - it was a stupid fucking picture of Cassandra and a little note on the bottom of it, saying ‘A vote for Cassandra is a vote for change.’ Good god.

It was like waiting for the bomb to drop, because he knew that everything was going too smoothly. He had the football team, cheerleading team, the drama club and the film club all supporting him so far. Additionally, his mother started treated him like a fucking person for once.

So, when he saw the poster his initial reaction was to go scream at her for a good five minutes, but then he just rolled his eyes and threw it in the garbage. He didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she pissed him off, but he really wanted to go and start an argument. Instead, he went out of his way to get a free pass during class and threw most of her stupid posters in the trash.

If anything, this would piss her off and she could be the one coming and screaming in his face. Which surprisingly is what happened.

At recess right before the last class of the day he heard her come up from behind, when he was standing by his locker.

“What the fuck, Harry!”

He turned around, looking the blonde up and down - his gaze stopped at her hand though, because of the crumbled-up posters she was holding. “What?”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t do this.” She says, her voice so sharp and seething you wouldn’t doubt she’s pissed.

Harry takes a second look at the posters in her hand, his eyes squinting ever so slightly, acting like he had no idea what she was referring to. He gives up the acts and shrugs carelessly. “What do you want me to tell you Cassandra? Those posters were ruining my eyesight.”

She gives him a fake smile, her eyes blazed with frustration. “Are you really so scared of competition, that you need to sabotage my campaign?”

“No.” he says. “I just thought I would help you realize the mistake you're making.”

Cassandra rolls her eyes in turn. “The only mistake I made was forgetting what a pain in the ass you are.”

“Just you wait, Cassandra. You’re gonna lose.”

“Just because you have the popular vote now, doesn’t mean people can’t see through your bullshit.”

“The only bullshit thing here is the fact that you think you can just sweep in and take this from me!” he spits in her face.

Recognition dawns in her features and then she is nodding. “Harry” she states. “You are just pissed because I’m the one you’re competing against.”

He shakes his head slightly, letting out a huff. “I don’t give a shit.” he denies. “We both know I have the biggest chance of winning this thing.”

“You seem really confident for someone who went all around school throwing out my posters.”

“Trust me, I was just doing everyone a favor of not having to look at that all day.”

Her jaw clenched at that. Finally.

“Fuck you Harry.” She throws out, before turning around.

“Oh, you would like to, wouldn’t you?” He called after her, as he watched her swagger down the hall.

The competition is on.

__________

The student body election was three weeks away now, and Harry was honestly becoming a little worried. But just a little.

Apparently, Cassandra had an advantage - the fact that she is a fucking girl. It hadn’t taken long before her campaign really sparked, especially because of her now feminist approach. She had been posting it everywhere on social media, but somehow the promise of a safer environment had also resonated with a bunch of the guys at their school.

But what pissed him off the most was the fact that the cheerleaders and drama club changed their mind about supporting Harry for the student body. Now they were all about Cassandra. When he found out he skipped his last class and took a few more pills than usual.

One late afternoon he was checking social media, when he came across her campaign profile. Her stupid pretty face was plastered all over it. Honestly it would be so much easier to hate her, if it wasn’t for her blonde wavy hair, her freckles and her intoxicating smile.

He came across her latest post and as if it couldn’t get even worse, Cassandra now also mentioned she would be helping smaller clubs get more funding. Of fucking course.

This girl would be the end of him.

**Harry’s phone**

  
loving the fake promises you are making

Cassandra: Nothing fake about them.  
Cassandra: You’re just jealous you didn’t think of it earlier.

oh, I thought about it  
just knew the principal would never go along with it

Cassandra: Well, then it seems your mother liked my proposal better, because I already spoke to her about it - and it’s in the bag.

_Read at 3.57_

His own mother, really?

See that was another thing, ever since Cassandra decided she was running, his mother started ignoring him again.

Normally he didn’t have a problem with his mother’s bad parenting, but that was when he had both his parents. He needed her, his sister needed her, but she just pretended as if nothing happened.

Ever since his dad died, Harry’s ‘drug abuse’ had worsened. He didn’t like to think of himself as depressed or an addict for taking a couple of pills, it was more a way of taking the edge off on those hard days.

Today was one of those days - Cassandra was being her usual perfect self and ruining everything for him, his mother was back to being the heinous bitch she usually was and, well, he really fucking missed his dad.

After Harry had laid in his bed for around 3 hours, snoozing off whenever and waking up abruptly about five minutes after, he had the perfect idea.

He needed to find some sort of dirt on Cassandra. Not that it was going to be easy, the girl was fucking perfect right down to the bone. But come on, everyone must have at least one skeleton in their closet.

__________

As it turns out she does, and when he finds out everything just makes a whole lot more sense. Her coming late to classes, her skipping some days, her looking like she might pass out from tiredness other days, and the need to always cover up her chest.

Harry would never in a million years have guessed she was ill, but then again it wasn’t like he spent that much time thinking about her.

Congenital heart defect, huh.

It hadn’t been hard to find out, he just ‘borrowed’ his mother’s key to her office. Then he sneaked off one night and found the papers on Cassandra.

Harry hadn’t expected to find anything, but he was ready to drop the bomb on her.

He wasn’t going to be a dick about it though, he considered sharing the information with the whole school, but somehow that just didn’t seem right.

It wasn’t like this was some meaningless gossip, this was something actually interesting and something she probably didn’t want everyone to know. It would ruin her image of being the perfect senior of West Ham High.

So instead, he was just going to confront her about it, and he found the perfect event to do it. His mother had planned a school function where the candidates are supposed to present their brand, talk to the other students at the school and get their ideas out there.

So about 30 minutes before the event started, he pulled Cassandra to the side.

“What?” her eyes were wide as she asked. They were standing closely out in the tiny hallway and he couldn’t help himself when he got a little lost in her round blue eyes.

And fuck, he needed to stop before he embarrassed himself.

She raised her brows slightly, looking wondersome up at him.

“Harry, if you're just gonna stand there and distract me, I have better things to do.” she said frustrated, before turning on her heel.

“Yeah, I bet.” he finally spoke. “Like maybe… I don’t know, taking your heart medication.” he pondered.

Cassandra turns right back around, her eyes narrowing as her brows knitted together. “How do you know about that?” she asked with a shaky voice.

A smirk started creeping its way up his face. “Was that you confirming it?” he asked.

The color had drained off her face, and he was really enjoying this. Finally, he had the upper hand. Her gaze was casted downwards and she looked a little worried, biting on her bottom lip. Suddenly though, she starts backing him up against the wall behind him. A stern look on her features, he could see her nostrils flaring as her finger basically poked a whole in his chest. “Fuck, Cassandra.” he muttered beneath his breath.

“Did you seriously look through my records?” she accused, her voice still a little shaky.

“How would I even do that?”

Her jaw clenched at that. “Can’t be that hard when you have access to the principal’s office.” she said, before pushing him one last time up against the wall and then letting go.

“Didn’t know you liked to be so aggressive.” He said, straightening himself up.

Her mouth went into a straight line, as she let her gaze go to his again. “What are you going to do?”

“Oh, it's not what I’m going to do, it’s what you are going to do.”

Cassandra sends a look, like she just wants this to be over with.

“You are dropping out of the race, or I’m leaking this.” he says confidently.

Cassandra let’s out a scoff. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“We both know I need this more than you.”

Her head tilts slightly. “That’s fucking bullshit Harry.” she says. “This doesn’t get you any advantages that you couldn’t get elsewhere.”

“Cassandra, you are already top of the fucking class and part of every other important club at school, trust me you don’t need this.”

“Your mother is the fucking principal, and you are part of one of the wealthiest families in this town - you can get in anywhere just based on that!”

“Fuck you Cassandra.”

“No, you know what?” she says. “Fuck you Harry. Leak my medical history or don’t, I really don’t care anymore.”

She starts walking down the hallway. “Come on Cass-”

At his words, she looks back at him over her shoulder, but doesn’t back turn around.

And then she was gone, leaving him standing alone in the hallway. Well, that didn’t go exactly how he wanted, at least he succeeds in getting her pissed off.

And in some way, it pays off even more, when he notices how badly she manages to do at the school function. She totally blows it; only speaking to a few people and then zoning out for the remainder of the event.

So, Harry still feels somewhat satisfied by the end of the day.

__________

The thing about Cassandra is that she is so fucking perfect, it’s difficult for anyone to even compare. It’s not like Harry wanted to think this, it’s just that it’s so obvious, he can’t exactly deny it.

He had tried speaking with his mom about the whole student body thing and brought up some ideas for his campaign - and somehow, she, his own mother, had found a way to make it all about Cassandra.

“Yeah, I think that idea is great.” she had said, not looking up from the papers on her desk. He thought of a new slogan he wanted to incorporate into his campaign, knowing it could probably win some votes. ‘A vote for Harry Bingham, is a vote for the students.’

His mom removed her glasses and looked up at him slowly. “Have you thought about how you are going to make it happen?” she asked.

He raised his shoulders into a shrug - well he hadn’t exactly thought out quite how he was going to make it work, but he just needed to get his mom on board first.

The look on his mom’s face didn’t seem like a good sign though, she let out a frustrated breath. “You know, Cassandra actually has some pretty great ideas.”

He couldn’t help himself when he rolled his eyes. “I bet she does, but I was thinking for my campaign, maybe-”

“Harry sweetheart, I’m actually quite occupied right now.” she interrupted him. “Could we maybe speak about this later?”

God, could she just listen to him for once. He let out a frustrated sound, before turning around and saying over his shoulder. “Sure.”

__________

The weekend was spent receiving all his campaign material at the postal office, and then getting it ready to hand out the next week. Grizz and Luke were helping him with the whole thing, which was great.

Grizz, Luke and Harry had been friends ever since they were little and knowing they were supporting him, and his campaign meant a lot to him. Also, because he knew how much Grizz also cared about Cassandra and her family, so knowing he chose him really got Harry geared up for the week to come.

He could always ask Clarke or Jason, but they really aren’t all that reliable. Not that it’s a bad thing, honestly Harry was kind of thankful for that - knowing they didn’t really care too much was such a relief most days.

Speaking of being reliable, Campell hadn’t been at all. He had tried calling him last week, after Harry spoke with his mom, and Campell didn’t pick up or return any of his phone calls. He hadn’t even seen him at school, and it wasn’t that Harry was worried about Campell, no, Harry was worried about losing his fucking mind.

He had run out of his supply recently and with everything going on, he was desperate. It was fucking unbearable.

The week went by fine though, he had managed to hand out a lot of his campaign gear - which consisted of T-shirts, stickers and buttons. If there was one thing he was aware of, it was that Cassandra never could afford to go all out, like him.

By Thursday everything had worked out like he wanted, so far Harry was still leading in the run. Especially now that everyone was digging his merchandise. If the election was tomorrow, he could probably win by a landslide. But alas, there was still a week and a day left.

On a normal Thursday he normally had debate after school, but today the debate team had planned something a little different. Apparently since Cassandra and him were doing so well in the run for student body president, they had planned a little beforehand celebration. Obviously, there was going to be another, bigger celebration after the election, but this was for all the debate kids who were running.

He already enjoyed debate as it was, but today was something special. Everyone was having a good time and somehow one of their debate teammates had managed to allow some alcohol at the gathering.

Harry has a couple of drinks but soon feels a little more bussed than he probably should be on school grounds. He just needed something to calm him down, and with all the free drinks available he didn’t see why not.

It wasn’t like he was the only one drinking, even Cassandra looked a little tipsy. He had caught himself staring at her a few more times than he should be, but every time he did, he felt the urge to take another sip of his beer.

It was just that Cassandra looked annoyingly good when she wasn’t being a fucking bitch to him. She was wearing a basic T-shirt and a pair of blue mom-jeans that fit her body nicely. But honestly that wasn’t what made him stare at her, it was the way her blonde hair was framing her face, the flustered look on her cheeks and the way she was just laughing carelessly at whatever her friend had said. It was the fact that even though he wanted to hate her, he knew he never could.

But then, she caught him looking at him and fuck. Cassandra doesn’t seem to think anything of it though, just raises her brow and smiles at him. In turn he raises his drink, he sees her finish her drink and make her way over to the drinks table where he was standing.

“Hey.” he said, looking down at the girl in front of him.

“Hi.” she said softly. “Your campaign stuff is quite impressive.”

He drew his lower lip between his mouth surprised at her words, his mouth formed into a smirk. “Wow, a compliment from Cassandra Pressman?” he says, amused.

The corners of her mouth turned upwards. “Yeah.” she said sheepishly. “Someone actually gave me one, so now I have my very own ‘Harry Bingham T-shirt’.” she said before letting out a little giggle.

“Really?” he chuckled.

She just nodded.

“God, I would love to see you walking around school with my face on your chest.”

She looked up at him with a get real look. “In your wildest dreams, Harry.” She then turns to mix a drink for herself.

“You sure you should drink more?” he says, looking over her movements - apparently Cassandra liked her drinks spicy.

Cassandra scoffs at that. “Like you’re one to talk.”

“You’re literally swaying on the spot.” he says gesturing towards her. “You sure you shouldn’t just switch to water?”

“Like you haven’t drunk just as much as me, if not more.” Which, he guesses was true, but Harry could hold his liquor.

“Are you even allowed to drink so much?” he asked, and because of the frown on her face he elaborated. “You know, because of your heart?”

Her nose wrinkled and her face scrunched up, she looked kinda cute. “It’s fine, I can drink as long as I don’t mix it with my medication.” She said reassuringly.

Harry just nodded as he observed her take a sip of her mixed drink. Cassandra then peered up at him again, keeping her drink close so it was covering her mouth as she spoke, quietly. “Thank you, by the way, for not telling anyone.”

He nodded his head reassuringly. “Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

And somehow, they ended on a good note for once.

__________

Fortunately, or rather unfortunately that didn’t last very long. The next day he came an hour late. Kelly had texted him saying she needed a break, because apparently, she found out he had been drinking yesterday, god forbid. It was literally on school grounds, but whatever, she always came back around. So, he had decided to skip his first period and arrive late.

When he walked in, he soon realized people were overjoyed over some dumb cupcakes.

Of course, he couldn’t have one thing that Cassandra wouldn't ruin. He could make cupcakes too, or something people are actually a fan of, like brownies or something.

As he was walking through the halls, he overheard a couple of people mentioning how astonishing the cupcakes were, and oh how amazing Cassandra's campaign was. He wanted to barf. Did they really forget what he had been handing out the entire week? How could those cupcakes even compare to the hundreds of dollars he had spent on his campaign merch?

Later down the hall he spotted a couple of people wearing his merch but also eating the cupcake they had in their hands. Harry let out a confused breath of relief, before continuing to class.

People really thought they could just go around and support both, when everyone knew in the end, they only had one vote.

The election was about a week away now and he needed to win this. There wasn’t really a lot more to do in the campaign but have his pre-election speech and then everyone was supposed to vote. He started writing his speech a few days ago, and it was quite impressive - he had inserted a joke at the beginning; that he knew most people would understand and because of his many hours on the debate team, he was ready to answer all the questions people would have for him afterwards.

The last thing he needed was to find someone willing to help him out with his speech. He was going to ask Grizz, mostly because that man was smart as fuck, but also because Grizz already had expressed his support in Harry’s campaign… and yeah Grizz was also one of Harry’s favorite friends - which didn’t say a lot, considering all his friends are idiots.

The day went by smoother than he had expected. When the third period of the day rolled around, he was sitting and trying to focus on the page of their textbook, when all of the sudden someone knocked on the classroom’s door.

He didn’t pay it any attention, until he realized who had knocked, Allie, Cassandra’s little sister. He didn’t know anything about the girl, except for the fact that she was related to Cassandra. She was a lot tinier than Cassandra though. It wasn’t really Allie that caught his attention but the cupcake tin she had in her hands.

“Is it okay if I hand out these? We’re handing them out to every class today.” he heard the younger Pressman say in a rushed tone. Before he knew it, their teacher had opened the door for her, and she was passing one out to every kid in their class.

A cupcake then appeared on his desk, and he couldn’t help but let out a little huff. God, this was ridiculous. The cupcake was frosted yellow, with the words reading ‘vote for Cassandra’ in small letters.

He pushed it to the edge of his desk and continued his schoolwork while listening to everyone munch on their cupcakes. When he heard someone actually let out a moan because of how good the cupcake apparently was he couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

__________

For some reason he didn’t think the day could get worse, but he was wrong. By the last class of the day, he placed himself next to Grizz before the class started. Their teacher had handed out some papers, when Harry turned to Grizz. “Could you come over later and help me with my campaign speech?”

Grizz raised his head and lifted his brows at him. “Can’t tonight.”

“Why not?” Harry asked, it wasn’t like it was going to take the entire evening.

“I’m helping out Cassandra with hers later.” he said, obviously not realizing how that would affect him.

Harry let out a scoff. If there was one of his friends he thought he could count on, it was Grizz, but fuck that. “You’re helping Cassandra?” he asked confused.

“Yeah.” Grizz said writing something on his paper. “Hey, did you try one of the cupcakes?”

This was unbelievable. Harry shook his head at Grizz’s question - he hadn’t tried one of her cupcakes, he waited till the end of his class and had thrown it in the trash.

“Did you not get one?” Grizz asked, confused. “We counted and supposedly there was supposed to be enough for everyone.”

What? So not only was Grizz helping her write her fucking speech, but he had also baked cupcakes with her?

“Since when are you helping Cassandra with her campaign?”

Grizz shrugged, as if it was no big deal. “She asked a while ago, if I could help her out.”

He didn’t bother responding. All he wanted to do at this moment was go home and drown himself in a couple of Xanax.

“Hey, if you want, I could come over on Saturday?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

__________

Okay, so not only did Cassandra turn his mother against him and fuck up his chances of becoming student body president, now she had to take Grizz too.

Not that she literally ‘took’ Grizz, but she could have asked anyone to help her with her dumb speech, why did she choose the one person she knew he had asked?

He knew that Cassandra and Grizz were friends, hell they had all been much closer when they were younger, but he hadn’t realized they were so close to the point that she would want his help in the campaign.

Grizz was smart, but many people at their school were, and he was pretty sure Cassandra could have asked all of them and they would have done it no questions asked.

After laying in his bed all weekend he decided that she wasn’t allowed to win this time around. No. He was going to make her listen and he was going to win this fucking election.

It was first when he knocked against the Pressman’s front door, that he realized he had driven all the way there. Harry had been there a bunch of times before when they were younger and actually friends but hadn’t been there since probably seventh grade.

The door swung open and there she stood with a look on her face that conveyed nothing but confusion. “Harry?”

“I need to talk to you.” he rushed and pushed past her into her house.

“Okay?” he heard her mutter under her breath as she closed the front door.

Just as the door shut closed, he was in her face. “What the fuck is the matter with you?”

The frown on her soft features just intensified. “Excuse me?”

He shook his head quickly and frustratedly, before gesturing with his hands as he spoke. “You always have this need to take everything from me!”

“Harry-”

“One thing is what happens at school, but for fucks sake; Grizz?”

“You’re mad that I asked for his help?” she asked, confused. “Harry, you’re not the only one he is friends with.”

“I’m mad at the fact that you always take, take, take-”

She stepped closer to him then, a stern look on her face. “I didn’t take anything from you, could you stop saying that?” her voice reached a peak as she spoke.

“Really?” He let out a little huff, tilting his head.

“Yes, really!” She was practically yelling in his face now. “You always accuse me of everything that has ever gone wrong but guess what; it’s not my fucking fault that things don’t work out for you!”

His brows knit together at her words. “I don’t accuse you of-”

“Harry, just get out.” She said, not wanting to deal with his shit anymore, her voice was steadier, she seemed more in control, more relaxed.

“Cassandra-”

She sends him a pointed look that stops him from continuing, he turns on his heels heading for the door.

The thing is, he doesn’t want to stop, he wants to let her know everything he has been thinking lately. So, he does what he does best and turns around and starts again. “No, no I’m not gonna do that”

Before he gets another word out, he notices her rolling her eyes. “Just listen and I’ll be out of your hair.” he rushed.

Cassandra says nothing, just gestured for him to continue.

“When I first campaigned for the student body everything was fine considering, but then you started campaigning as well and along with that came all of this shit.” Harry let out a deep breath, rolling his shoulders - trying to ease himself into continuing. “And I don’t give a shit that you and Grizz are friends, but it’s the fact that you knew he was helping me, and you still thought you could just ask him.”

“I asked Grizz weeks ago.”

It wasn’t like that even mattered, everyone knew that Grizz was helping him and his campaign - that was how he had gotten the football’s team vote in the first place. If all of the sudden he was also helping Cassandra, well then Harry could lose a lot of votes. “It still doesn’t change anything.”

Cassandra looked frustrated up at him. “I didn’t realize you would get this upset.”

“Bullshit!” He said, wasting no time before getting in her face again.

“It’s not like I can do anything about it now!”

He took a moment to look her up and down, knowing it would piss her off in this situation. She was wearing a black zip-up hoodie and one of her usual skirts, she wasn’t wearing any footwear though, which only made her shorter than she normally appears. “You could always drop out of your campaign.” he stated as if it was the most obvious thing.

Cassandra let out a huff and rolled her eyes momentarily. “Are you really that afraid you’re gonna lose?” she wondered, taking a step closer.

He looked down at her, his eyes glazed with annoyance, but he didn’t say anything, and apparently that made her continue talking. She took yet another step in his direction, a smug look on her face. “You could always just take another pain-killer if it doesn’t work out.”

He let out a scoff. “Fuck you Cassandra.”

While his jaw was clenched, Cassandra just stared up at him with a smirk that made his nostrils flare. They were standing so close he could practically see his own reflection in her eyes. He couldn’t tell if he wanted to kiss her or kill her.

As his forehead was creased, he let his eyes wander down to her lips and back up, but when he focuses on her again, she’s staring down at his lips.

Her eyes dart back to his and not even a second goes by before they both lunge forward meeting each other in a greedy kiss. He kisses her roughly, pressing his body towards hers as he grabs her tightly around the waist.

Cassandra pulls at the curls at the back of his neck, pulling his lips from hers. “We shouldn’t do this.” she says hoarsely, as she runs her thumb across his bottom lip.

Cassandra’s eyes are locked on his lips as her finger glides across it and the moment is so surreal that all he wants is for her to kiss him again and again and again. By her movements alone, he knew she wanted this as much as he did. When finally she meets his gaze, he leans in and as his lips ghost over hers he whispers hoarsely “I don’t care.”

Cassandra closes the distance between them by cupping his cheek and drags him down to meet her lips. It’s as if an electric spark bolts through his body and he needs her closer, needs her as close as he can get her. The sweet smell of her perfume is so engulfing, he almost loses focus, but feels her tug harder on his tousled hair.

Fuck it, he thinks. Then he grabs her by the thighs and pushes her up against the wall next to the front door while his fingers dig into her hips. He hears her let out a strangled ‘Harry’ and it entices him to start kissing down her neck and collarbone, earning a quiet moan that she definitely tried to hold back. “Your parents’ home?” he asks huskily, between kisses.

He makes his way back up, using extra time on the sweet spot on her neck. When he finally gets a look at her face, he can tell how flushed she is - her cheeks pink, her hair a mess and her lips swollen from the way he had kissed her. She shakes her head, and he gets lost in her eyes and for once he lets himself. Just standing there and holding her while looking at her round blue eyes dilate, he finally realized how fucking beautiful she is. He always knew, had even considered her one of the prettiest girls at school (not that he would ever admit that), but this brought it to a new level.

He knew he was staring at her with admiration in his eyes, but he didn’t care, he loved looking at her. But perhaps he shouldn’t have stopped kissing her, because suddenly he saw the features on her face change, and he could practically feel her tense up in his arms. Sensing her closing up, he lifted his chin as if asking ‘what’s wrong?’

“Are you still with Kelly?” She asks, her voice worried and quiet.

And fuck. He hadn't even been thinking about Kelly, but now looking into Cassandra's ocean-blue orbs he didn’t want to let her go. Harry finally had her where he’s wanted her all along. His brows knit together as he shook his head.

It isn’t a complete lie; they had decided to take a break about a week ago. Apparently, she wasn’t a fan of him doing drugs and wasting his time getting drunk every now and again, did she not have any sympathy for him? Anyway, Kelly had made it very clear that he needed to get his shit together before getting back together.

He wanted it to come off reassuringly, but by the still occurring frown on Cassandra’s face he doesn’t think he succeeded. His grip on her is way more loose now, not wanting to push her if she was going to stop it. His fingers traced circles on her thigh where her skirt had ridden up. He raises his brows and sends her a serious look. “No.” he says determined.

Cassandra took a moment, just staring into his own dark eyes when finally, her expression relaxed. He takes it as a sign and leans closer to her, their lips almost touching. They are so close it’s hard to think straight, and then she leans in and reaches his lips again.

And then they are kissing again, but this time it’s much less rough. His hands traveling downwards slowly, caressing every part of her body. Their kisses turn soft and they end up just leaving brushes of lips against the other. It’s so gentle and tender with their shaking breaths. He doesn’t think he’s ever kissed anyone like this before, never kissed anyone with such passion and longing.

They are still attached at the mouth when his one hand slides up above her thigh and he reaches the side of her panties. He flicks the material with his fingers, when he feels Cassandra pull harder at his curls as she displays kisses down his neck.

Fuck, she will be the end of him.

Testing, he slowly moves his hand to the center of her panties, hearing Cassandra moan into his neck. Harry lets out a chuckle when he feels how damp she is through her underwear and presses his thumb deeper against her center.

He can tell Cassandra is holding back especially by her fingernails digging into the top of his back and her biting and leaving kisses on his neck. It’s hot as fuck, and he loves every second of it, but he wants to hear her.

Then Cassandra moves to purr in his ear. “Upstairs.”

Harry doesn’t wait a second, adjusting her in his arms and carrying her up the stairs towards her room. The walk there takes a while, whenever he walks them into something, they both let out a short laugh, before stopping completely to admire and kiss each other again.

When they do eventually make it up there, Harry throws her on the bed, not wasting any more time. He intended to crawl on top of her the moment she was on the bed, but instead he watches her undress right in front of him. And fuck, how can this girl be this perfect?

The coy smile she gives him when she discards her hoodie gets him ecstatic and he can’t help himself, so he lays down on the bed with her. He starts leaving open-mouthed kisses up her chest, slightly grazing her scar. He’d never seen it before and feels rather special that she allows him to see this much of him.

Harry grazes her scar with his finger, taking a moment to admire it, admire how strong Cassandra must be and then he leans down to give it a tender kiss. He feels as Cassandra goes still under his body, but only for a second. She brings his face back to hers and he leans down to kiss her again. Cassandra bites her lip teasingly when she feels him press himself onto her - his crotch against hers. She lifts herself off the bed and meets him in another kiss, running her tongue over his lower lip. Because of her position on the bed, Harry can reach behind her and snap open her bra. She lets out a gasp at the action and lays herself down again, removing her bra completely.

He grins down at her. “Fuck.” he mummers, slightly dumbstruck. Then he leans down and sucks on her nipple harshly and he can’t help but grin at her when she cries out his name. “Shut up.” she tries sounding serious, but it doesn’t have its usual bite to it. He just smirks in return.

Cassandra traces her hand along his hip bone, before stroking his bulge through his jeans. He starts sitting up, needing better accessibility to remove his belt, but then Cassandra sits as well and removes his belt in one swift move. She undoes the button and zips his jeans down, then he discards them somewhere on the floor. “This your first time?” he asks, genuinely wondering - she didn’t seem nervous at all and everything they had done so far was honestly perfect, but he just couldn’t imagine who she would have done this with.

On que she flips them over so she’s on top. “Fuck you.” she murmurs against his mouth, before kissing him hard, biting down on his bottom lip. He lets out a chuckle at her response and she just grind down against him.

Soon all their clothes are gone, and Cassandra is sinking down onto him and riding him at a steady pace. Moans and cuss words fill the room, but then Harry gets impatient, flipping them over yet again and pounding in and out of her on the rocky bed.

And Jesus Christ, Harry had been high many times, but this couldn’t even compare - that’s how fucking good it felt.

He always knew Cassandra was perfect, but he hadn’t realized she would feel this good, now with their bodies pressed tightly together and moving quickly. He hates it, hates how good she feels, and hates how they haven’t done this sooner.

When she clenches around him, he knows she’s close and keeps pounding, riding both their orgasm’s out.

__________

Afterwards they lay splattered on the bed, breathless just looking at each other. She has a lazy look in her eyes and he really wants to kiss her again, so he does. Pulling her close again, he cups her cheek and kisses her soft lips. “That was fucking amazing.” he whispers as he tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear.

He feels so content and he hates that she probably doesn’t. “It can’t happen again.” she says, raises her brows somewhat to convey that she’s serious. He knows she’s probably right, it shouldn't even have happened in the first place, but it did and now he’s gonna be thinking about it for the rest of his life. If he could, he would never go back to how they were before, but that’s not the world they live in.

Still, he doesn’t want to let go of the fantasy just yet. “Why not?”

Cassandra lays her head on his chest, probably hearing how his heart is thumping inside his chest. Instead of answering him, she surprises him. “I’m sorry about what I said earlier.” she’s moved her head so she can look him in the eye. “I shouldn’t have said that... I know you are struggling.”

Harry doesn’t know what to say, it isn’t like she’s wrong; he hated her for saying those things, but he never thought she really meant them. So, he doesn’t say anything, and she returns her head so she isn’t facing him, just listening to his heartbeat.

They lay there for a while, he doesn't even know how long, all he knows at that moment is that he wants to lay there forever - with her, all cuddled up in her bed. His gaze wonders around the room, taking everything in since he’d never been in her room before. His eyes quickly fall on the ‘Harry Styles’ poster on her wall and he can’t help but let out a little snicker. Ironic. Cassandra raises her head, wondering what's got him laughing, when her phone rings.

Cassandra sit’s up and talks quietly into her phone, he doesn’t try to listen, just stares at her back as she talks.

Cassandra sounds stressed with the way she is talking on the phone, and everything comes crumbling down when she turns around and rushes “Shit, okay, you need to go.”

And the whole daze they had been trapped in evaporates. The look of regret on her face is evident and he hates himself for noticing.

He hurries, quickly finding his clothes scattered all around the room and goes for the door. None of them say anything and he walks out.

__________

Maybe they shouldn’t have fucked and perhaps crossing that line was stupid, because all of Harry’s thoughts consisted of Cassandra now. Well, maybe not all, but it sure as hell is too many.

He would be doing schoolwork and then he would think of Cassandra, then he would try thinking about his speech, but she flooded his thoughts again and even when he thought of Kelly his mind just reminded him of Cassandra again.

It was fucking exhausting, especially because he didn’t want to think about her, he already did that plenty before they slept together.

He doesn’t talk to her all week, both busy with prepping for their big speech on Thursday. It was a great distraction, especially because this is something he really wanted to succeed at. He knew his mother would be proud of him, for once and he might even get Kelly back. Two birds one stone. Plus, if he won, he knew it would piss Cassandra off to no end.

So, he actually takes his time to sit down and memorize his speech, rehearsing the opening, middle and ending. He even swallows his pride and asks Grizz to come over and help him out with prepping for post-speech questions.

So, when he stands in front of the big mirror of some random gym room; he feels ready. Everyone running for the student body president was supposed to be getting ready in the same room, and well the tension was so thick it could be cut with a knife.

He had dressed in his best and newest suit, looking the part. He was adjusting his tie when Cassandra came up behind him, looking classy as ever.

They hadn’t spoken since Sunday night, but seeing her now he wished they had. They were both standing in front of the big mirror, Cassandra wasn’t paying attention to him though, instead just ran a hand through her golden hair. Clearly, she was doing it on purpose, he smirked and turned towards her. “Ready for me to beat you?”

Cassandra chuckles lightly and finally lets her eyes glaze over his body through the mirror. “That depends.” She smirks as her gaze lands on his face. “Did you actually rehearse?”

He nods with a smile playing at his lips. “I did,” he says. “Maybe we could go somewhere and rehearse together?”

“I don’t think letting your opponent hear your speech before going on is a great idea…” she says as she brings her one hand up to pull her hair behind her shoulder, revealing her neck and a fading love bite, knowing it was the result of his doing.

Harry smirks at her through the mirror, and he can see a flush creep up her neck. “I think it’s a great idea.” he leans in to whisper in her ear. “Maybe I could even help you restore that spot on your neck.”

Cassandra turns her head to lock him dead in the eye (luckily no one was paying them any attention, too busy worrying about their dumb speech that would get overlook anyway). “Harry, that’s not happening again.” she says certainly, but the look in her eye betrays her.

“You sure about that?” From the spot he is standing, he can see her so clear and close. Her cheeks are slightly flushed, her hair brushed neatly framing her face. All she does is nod, not actually confirming with actual words - he takes that as a good sign.

“After the speech, can we talk?” he asks, making sure she knows he’s serious.

She opens her mouth, but before she can get a word in, they are cut off by one of the teachers who tells everyone it’s time to go on. “Just text me afterwards,” he says quickly. “Break a leg.” he says before turning towards the door.

“You too, literally.” Cassandra says with the corners of her mouth turning upwards. He sends a middle finger her way and gets on stage.

And then everyone has 3 minutes to give their big and final speech, which is followed by questions.

The thing is; when it’s his time to go on, Cassandra is kind of stuck on his mind, so he fucks up the opening because he can’t deliver his joke like he wanted to. Harry knew he fucked up, especially when he saw Grizz in the crowd looking at him confused, god he feels like an idiot now.

He must stand and listen to the other speeches as well and hates how amazingly Cassandra does at engaging the audience. Whatever, he can still win people over with questions, and that’s kind of what ends up happening.

He answers all questions rhetorically and wisely, knowing what kind of answers the voters wanted.

__________

When it was all over and done with, he finally let himself breathe for a moment - that whole ordeal was exhausting. So, he goes back to the room they were all in before, knowing no one would be in there, just trying to calm himself. He knew doing a joke as the opening was a risky move, but he wanted to appear reliable and funny, now he just turned into the joke. Luckily, he kind of managed to save himself with the questions, but most people had already dipped out at that time.

To calm himself he dug through his bag, locating the bottle of Xanax at the bottom of his bag. He grabbed the pill bottle and shook it, the sound of a couple of pills rattling in there. Shit, was he already running out again? He shook his head and decided fuck it by swallowing one and sitting himself down for a second.

His thought doesn’t seem to go far though, because Kelly steps into the room a minute after. Apparently, she wants to get back together, which was honestly kind of fucked up - did she only want him when people paid attention to him?

When she kisses him, his brows just knit together in confusion. Of course he wanted to get back together with Kelly - that had been the plan all along, but he couldn’t help but think that Cassandra’s lips had felt much better to kiss. Which also, was kind of fucked up, he shouldn’t be thinking about Cassandra when he was kissing his fucking girlfriend or ex-girlfriend, or he didn’t even know at this point.

He tries deepening the kiss, pushing the thoughts of Cassandra to the back of his mind. It’s only when he hears the door creak quietly that he opens his eyes to see Cassandra in the door opening, Kelly doesn’t seem to notice though, just keeps kissing away at his lips.

Before he can even do anything, he registers the hurt and offended look in her eye and then she is out of there.

Fuck.

__________

After getting home he goes straight to bed and just lies there for the rest of the evening. Harry just wanted to sleep, but his mind wouldn’t let him, falling from one topic to another every time he closed his eyes. He really fucked up everything, not only was he definitely going to lose tomorrow, but Cassandra had seen Kelly kissing him. She saw it out of context, but still.

It’s not that he thought anything more could ever happen with Cassandra, but he still had a little hope from the way she had smiled at him earlier. It was fucking crazy is what it is.

Cassandra and he had been friends when they were way younger, but then the older they got they just glided apart. It made sense why they were so close when they were younger, they both had the same drive and ambition - which is what made them the way they are today. Rivals.

He’d always admired her, even when they stopped being friends, she was smart as fuck and she never gave up. She could be infuriating as hell and piss him off to no end, but he still respected her more than anyone else. Harry used to feel that way about his dad too, but now he only has one parent left and he didn’t feel an ounce of respect towards her.

But no matter how much he admired or respected Cassandra, he always wanted and needed to feel better than her. Now all he wants is to be with her - and it’s not like he’s in love with the girl, it’s just that now he’s finally had her in the palm of his hand, and he didn’t want her to slip out of it so soon.

He thinks about grabbing another pill from the bottle in his bag but decides against it. It wouldn’t do anything for him, maybe make him fall asleep faster, but then he would have to face reality tomorrow a lot quicker too.

He thinks about getting drunk and high in the weekend to come, and the idea excites him a tiny bit.

But then he thinks about Cassandra and the high feeling he had gotten from being with her. He thinks of the look on her face when he knows she’s furious at him, the way she tries to hold her smile back when he’s said something that funny, her touch and her crying out his name in pleasure.

He wants her and its annoying cause he’ll never get her.

__________

The next day Harry went to school with a somewhat positive attitude. So what if he fucked up his speech, everything else in his campaign had been excellent all the way through. People would remember that (hopefully).

The election was established in a way so all the students who wanted to vote, could. They could cast one vote throughout the Friday, until around 1 pm, that's when the teacher in charge is to count the votes. By the end of the last period all students go to the gym, where the student body president is finally elected and that’s it.

Harry had pictured this day many times in his head, he wanted to be the one elected. His biggest competition was and will always be Cassandra, he was sure he would win if she hadn’t campaigned, but she did. So he’s a little stressed out the entire day, even though people pass by him and mention they voted for him.

He’s halfway through the third period when he gets a text-message from Cassandra, it’s a little surprising considering everything yesterday. She tells him to meet her in a specific classroom. With that information gathered he asks for a hall pass and makes his way out into the hallway.

When he gets there the room is empty and quiet, but then Cassandra shuts the door behind him and practically pushes him against it. “Ow!” he lifts his head at her. “What the fuck Cassandra?”

She looks fucking livid; her nostrils are flaring, and her posture is all tense while she sends him a stern look. “You lied to me!”

He adjusts his button up since Cassandra had rumpled it up slightly, not daring to look her in the eye when she was like this. Normally he loved to get her riled up, but that was usually about something dumb and superficial. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen her this angry with him before, and it’s kind of terrifying (but also frustratingly hot.)

“Harry!” she snaps, grabbing his attention.

He knows what she’s talking about, knows he made his own bed and now he has to lie in it. “I haven’t lied to you.” He denies, his tone softer while he steps closer to her. He even tries reaching for her, but she is having none of it.

“You cheated on Kelly with me.” The last part comes out quieter, probably scared someone would hear them. “Who does so-”

“I didn’t lie to you and I didn’t cheat on Kelly!”

She scoffs and crosses her arms over her chest. “You know I saw you guys yesterday, right?” she says unbelieving.

“We were on a break.” he states as if it’s obvious, god he hates how she could think he would just cheat on Kelly because of her. He probably would, it’s Cassandra for fucks sake, but did he come off that way? like a guy who would cheat on his girlfriend?

She rolls her eyes. “Does she know that? Do you think she knows you slept with other people?”

“One person.”

She lets out a deep breath and her strict posture loosens for a second. “When did you get back together?”

“We aren’t, she came onto me yesterday.”

Cassandra huffs. “Didn’t seem like you minded it…” she mutters, and then he gets it.

He lets out a huff himself, and then the corners of his mouth start tilting upwards. “You're jealous.”

“I'm not, I'm mad that you didn’t-” then she stops herself and Harry lets himself believe it’s because she really is jealous. “It wasn’t right.”

“Come on Cass” he says, reaching for her again.

She doesn’t give in to his touch though, just takes a step back. “No, it shouldn’t have happened.”

The fact that she was being so persistent about this whole thing was pissing him off. He knew that she wanted it just as much as he did, if not more - and he knew that if she hadn’t seen Kelly and him yesterday, she wouldn’t be yelling at him at all. “Really? so you haven’t thought about it once since it happened?”

“It doesn’t matter.” She doesn’t look at him, actually kinda shies away. It pisses him off, because he knows it matters, to both of them.

“Yes, it does! You can’t just keep pretending it didn’t happen.” He says a little too loudly.

Her eyes meet him again and he doesn’t think she’s gonna say anything, but then she asks. “Have you thought about it?”

Yes, only about 10 times a day. “Maybe”

Cassandra rolls her eyes at his response. She doesn’t say anything, so he tries again. “Did you really not feel anything?” he asks, quietly and looks into her eyes for the truth, except she is keeping her emotions sheltered.

She looks down then. “It’s never gonna work.”

He barely hears it, but he does. With his one hand he tilts her chin upwards so she is forced to look at him. “Maybe it will.” The hope in his tone was apparent, he didn’t want to lose whatever this was.

Her head is still forced upwards, but that doesn’t stop her from looking anywhere but at him. “It won’t” she says determined, before elaborating. “You have a girlfriend, and I don’t care if you guys are on a break or not, cause it’s obvious she doesn’t think that.”

Her gaze finally darts to his, and it honestly makes his heart clench a little bit. Shit. He was losing her and he never even had her to begin with.

“And what do you think people are gonna say when they find out? It’s not like we aren’t known for hating each other.”

“Fuck what people think.”

“No Harry.” she says determined. “None of us are willing to fuck up our image, just to be together.”

He lets go of her then, feeling as if she’s burnt him. It was only facts; if there was anything important to him it was his reputation.

Would people really care if they found out though? It wasn’t like it was such a big deal, well to some it might be a little shocking, but people could get over it, right? “So what?” he starts. “We’re just gonna ignore how we feel because of what other people think?” He asks unbelieving.

She looks away for a moment. “It was a mistake Harry; it didn’t mean anything and we didn’t feel anything other than lust.” Her voice is so determined that he knows this won't lead to anything.

“A mistake?”

“A mistake.” she says eventually, nodding her head and turning on her heels.

Then she's gone and Harry is left standing there all alone in the big classroom, feeling way more lost than ever before.

__________

Before going to the ceremony in the gym, he texts Campell and he gives him a couple of lines to sniff in the bathroom - apparently it was the only thing Campell had brought with him to school. Harry didn’t care though, he needed something strong to unwind and he couldn’t exactly go home.

An hour passed and as everyone had gathered in the gym, the teacher was finally announcing the winner. Harry was sitting along a couple of his friends, but noticed Cassandra sat a couple of rows in front of him, besides Grizz and Allie.

Everything has led up to this moment, but then he hears the teacher call out Cassandra’s name as the winner. His jaw clenches and as Jason starts saying there must have been a mistake Harry just shakes his head.

Of course, Cassandra was going to be the winner. It’s Cassandra, it’s always been Cassandra - he’s known that since the day he met her. He realizes he knew this would happen the moment she started campaigning.

Harry stares at her when she starts doing her speech, halfway through her eyes dart to his and he knows everything is gonna go back to how they were before. They would spit pity insults at each other and keep competing to be the best in their class.

It isn’t just the election he lost that day, hell right now, all he can think of is Cassandra. And all he knows is that he lost her too.

When he goes home later that day, he thinks this is the worst day he’s had since his dad died.


End file.
